“Mammoth, Bastard, Toe Ring, Pink Laces.”
Mammoth has been dragging his feet all day, God how much of self pity does this guy want to wallow in, ever since he got into an argument with that girl with a toe ring he’s been sulking and sulking. Get off that chair you lard bucket and hit the gym, then maybe she’ll think you are the man of her life or better you might just find a new one.
Hi there, for those who are wondering, I’m Mammoth’s shoelace, just thought I would give an interesting perspective of mammoth’s life since I see things right from the bottom up(pun intended). I’ve been a part of life since childhood, still remember the first time he tripped by me on stage and how that started his whole self esteem problem.
Enough about that though, let’s come back to today. The dude grumbles and mumbles to himself that how he’s a man some girls would be lucky to have, yes of course however the point is they want to be luckier and not just lucky, right? He moves onto tinker with his computer while listening to “born to be wild”, shakes his head as if he’s the wildest thing in town, had half a mind to strangle him but then again “26 year old accidentally strangles himself with a shoe lace” would be too much to digest for everyone. Anyhow the self proclaimed IT geek bangs away at the keyboard for 15 minutes so intensely you would think he was making the next supercomputer.
Mammoth’s done now after 15 minutes of doing nothing on the black box, genius boy obviously couldn’t focus because of all the self pity. He’s calling up his child hood friend the Bong Bastard(BB) now, poor fella doesn’t have any idea about the kind of rambling he’s in for, the mammoth starts with recession and how he wants to leave this city and get a new life, should try leaving his own house first maybe. After wandering a bit genius boy gets down to bitching toe ring out, BB offers useless advice the kind divorce lawyers offer before stating their fees, then suggests getting a new girl. However it hardly helps, lard bucket over here is a single tyre organism, basically you take out the human DNA and you’ve got a ball of fat that keeps on whining and rolling till it runs you over.
BB hangs up after a bit, due to desperation and a much needed loo break, you would think after bitching her out so much, mammoth would take a break. Hell, he calls up toe ring immediately and starts with immediately bitching about BB, boy can he bitch or what, after an hour last month’s phone bill flashes across his eyes. Genius calculates he could have paid the maid for months using the money spent on phone bills, hmm so the maid’s cheaper than four months of love talk but no sex, Shiney did have a point. Toe Ring girl is just happy that the focus is off her and now onto BB’s shortcomings.
Mammoth is now yawning, she must be yapping about her new boss, god what’s wrong with this female so she has got a new boss, doesn’t matter! Woman just kiss butt, if he’s cute sleep with him and then tell tales to get him fired for harassment, if he’s a she then get her to sleep with someone else, get her fired, get a new boss, now repeat cycle till you get a boss you could rollover with a pencil. Finally Mammoth hangs up as the door bell rings, oh it’s that cute neighbor from downstairs, Long legs, nice sneakers from nike, those pink laces, shivers up my thread baby, hubba hubba !
Hi there, for those who are wondering, I’m Mammoth’s shoelace, just thought I would give an interesting perspective of mammoth’s life since I see things right from the bottom up(pun intended). I’ve been a part of life since childhood, still remember the first time he tripped by me on stage and how that started his whole self esteem problem.
Enough about that though, let’s come back to today. The dude grumbles and mumbles to himself that how he’s a man some girls would be lucky to have, yes of course however the point is they want to be luckier and not just lucky, right? He moves onto tinker with his computer while listening to “born to be wild”, shakes his head as if he’s the wildest thing in town, had half a mind to strangle him but then again “26 year old accidentally strangles himself with a shoe lace” would be too much to digest for everyone. Anyhow the self proclaimed IT geek bangs away at the keyboard for 15 minutes so intensely you would think he was making the next supercomputer.
Mammoth’s done now after 15 minutes of doing nothing on the black box, genius boy obviously couldn’t focus because of all the self pity. He’s calling up his child hood friend the Bong Bastard(BB) now, poor fella doesn’t have any idea about the kind of rambling he’s in for, the mammoth starts with recession and how he wants to leave this city and get a new life, should try leaving his own house first maybe. After wandering a bit genius boy gets down to bitching toe ring out, BB offers useless advice the kind divorce lawyers offer before stating their fees, then suggests getting a new girl. However it hardly helps, lard bucket over here is a single tyre organism, basically you take out the human DNA and you’ve got a ball of fat that keeps on whining and rolling till it runs you over.
BB hangs up after a bit, due to desperation and a much needed loo break, you would think after bitching her out so much, mammoth would take a break. Hell, he calls up toe ring immediately and starts with immediately bitching about BB, boy can he bitch or what, after an hour last month’s phone bill flashes across his eyes. Genius calculates he could have paid the maid for months using the money spent on phone bills, hmm so the maid’s cheaper than four months of love talk but no sex, Shiney did have a point. Toe Ring girl is just happy that the focus is off her and now onto BB’s shortcomings.
Mammoth is now yawning, she must be yapping about her new boss, god what’s wrong with this female so she has got a new boss, doesn’t matter! Woman just kiss butt, if he’s cute sleep with him and then tell tales to get him fired for harassment, if he’s a she then get her to sleep with someone else, get her fired, get a new boss, now repeat cycle till you get a boss you could rollover with a pencil. Finally Mammoth hangs up as the door bell rings, oh it’s that cute neighbor from downstairs, Long legs, nice sneakers from nike, those pink laces, shivers up my thread baby, hubba hubba !
No comments:
Post a Comment